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Half Man Half Biscuit - Upon Westminster Bridge Lyrics

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  • Same old Hampstead
  • Ken Hom Wok Set
  • Dead Sea bath salts
  • Jog-proof iPod
  • Iron Age hill fort
  • Long term roadworks
  • High tide bird watch
  • B&Q Homebase
  • If Jesus came to Earth today
  • They’d crucify him straight away
  • Upon a cross of MDF
  • And they’d use No Need For Nails
  • Ship-shape farmhouse
  • Dry stone wall chart
  • Cash-back foot spa
  • Straight down Ladbrokes
  • Low cost school trip
  • Ramraid Oxfam
  • Christ that sun’s hot
  • Yes that’s right sir
  • Oh help me Mrs Medlicott
  • I don’t know what to do
  • I’ve only got three bullets
  • And there’s four of Motley Crue
  • Spoiling Good Friday my ex-love sent to me
  • Twelve drummers singing
  • Eleven chairmen dancing
  • Ten mascots whinging
  • Nine stewards flapping
  • Eight christening invites
  • Seven cows a-barking
  • Six vicars strumming
  • Nick *****ing Knowles
  • Four boring words
  • Carphone Warehouse and Matalan
  • And a pulled up at Bangor-on-Dee
  • I’m driving backwards at peak hour
  • Along the Edgware Road

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