Horrible Histories - The Monks' Song Lyrics
Welcome to our monasteryPlease have a chairGood to see you monks So deep in prayerOnce the praying's finishedYour chores must be doneThe main rule of a good monk's life is no funWe have to pray eight times a daySeven days a weekAnd copy all these manuscriptsIn writing so antiqueI'll finish off this letter 'A'Once I've ploughed our fieldMilked the cows, mucked the sows, vegetables peeledI'll be doing that and praying tooVery well gents, I'll bid you adieuAdvenium regnum tuum(Okay brothers, I think he's gone)Now the bishop's not aroundThrow off these religious gownsHunky, chunky, funky monksGet down! It's not all hymns and prayin'It's not all work and no playin'So let's start misbehavin'And get with the funk! We love to have a partyEat food that is heartyLet's get the boozin' startedDrunk like a monk! Play that monky music, funk boy! Just wanted to checkThat during my absenceYou're honouring yourMealtime vow of silenceAlthought we didn't oughterWe liked to hunt and slaughterDon't need no bread and waterJust funk, funk, funk! Monastery is jumpin'Party beat is thumpin'Just lacks a certain somethin'A funky nun! Get in the party habit, girlfriend! It's true that lifeIs tough hereBut you obey the rulesThat is clearThat's why we're a placeOf great reputeWhat's this? I see we have a new recruitWelcome to our monasteryWhat's your name? She- he can't talk And his name is... WayneAmen! Ah men!
