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Horrible Histories - We're History Lyrics

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  • Stone Age brought you speech, farms, the wheel and fire.
  • Then metal was explored which meant we could make swords to kill, and build empires.
  • Think Ancient Egypt was nicer? Pharaoh’s tombs, lovely shrines?
  • But some were living graves for hundreds of poor slaves and pig's eye was our cure for the blind.
  • Greek civilisation our creation, drama and philosophy.
  • But Sparta praised lying; celebrated dying and Hippocrates drank wee.
  • We're History.
  • We brought you bloodshed.
  • Greek excursions to battle the Persians.
  • Disembowelling our dead.
  • Together we made the world a little bit grim.
  • We're History.
  • Could be fairly dim.
  • We Romans brought you roads and public medicine,
  • Gladiator fighting, feeding men to lions, burning Christians. That kind of thing, you know.
  • Then came the Middle Ages; Saxons, Normans, Vikings, Celts,
  • A time of invasion, feudalism, famine, Black Death, bubos and welts.
  • 1066 saw Harold in a fix as William conquered all.
  • What was the bettin' an arrow in his retina would lead to his downfall?
  • We're History.
  • We brought invasion and strife.
  • We attacked monasteries, said "Give us gold, please", then we took your life.
  • Our crusades meant slaughter wherever we’d go.
  • We're History
  • Was it pretty? No.
  • Tudor, Stuart, Georgian monarchs next in line
  • Brought progress in science and art.
  • Also beheadings, burning, civil war
  • Breed an economy, for a start.
  • We're History.
  • We gave you plague and disease.
  • Travelled, found the Incans, spread smallpox in a blink and brought them to their knees.
  • Dogs, cats and the French blamed for plague along the way.
  • We're History.
  • Not such happy days.
  • Victorian technology went hand-in-hand with poverty,
  • Kids up chimneys and down mines.
  • Improvements to the world did pick up despite some violent hiccups;
  • Two World Wars, millions died.
  • We're History.
  • Our times smelly and gory.
  • We reigned over you and told you what to do
  • And that is this story.
  • Thought we were amazing though you may quibble.
  • We're History and we made it horrible.
  • We're History!

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