Too Short - Freaky Tales Lyrics
These are the tales, the freaky tales...The tales that I tell so well...I met this girl, her name was joanShe loved the way I rocked the microphoneWhen I met joan, I took her homeShe was just like a doggy all on my boneI met another girl, her name was annAll she wanted was to freak with a manWhen I met ann, I soked her pansWe ended up freakin by garbage canThe next young freak I met was redI took her to the house and she gave me headShe likes to freak was all she saidWe jumped in the sheets and we broke my bedTheres another girl, her name is maryTalked about sex and the girl acted scaryI heard she was freakin for my homeboy jerryTook her to the house and I popped that cherryYoung and tender, sweet deniseGet her in the bed and the girls a beastI tell you, homeboy, if you get a pieceShe only talks about signin a leaseI met this tender, her name was loriAnd a x-rated movie wouldnt tell her storyShe had a twinsister, her name was lisaAnd just like lori, shes a real dick pleaserMy girlfriends name was michelle, I freaked her wellHer ***** got hotter than flames in hellI geed this girl, her name was tammyI didnt wanna do it cause the ***** was flammyShe had a best friend, her name was janeI pulled to the side and I spitted that gameI met a lot of freaks in my lifespineFreaked one night with a girl named pamThe very next day I saw her with her manOne week passed and I was in her againI had an old tender, her name was janieShe was thirty-two and I was only eighteenShe likes to freak, shes just a fiendIt really didnt matter when I saw her in jeansI wanna big freak, fat and slobbyI kick on back and I watch her mouthTwo tons of fun, big mama jamaA country-girl from alabamaI met this girl, her name was bettyHer ***** got wet and it smelled like deathI was tired as hell, I was drippin sweatBut I was all up in her tryin to hold my breathBake and shake us, I met this freak in vegasShe said her name was donnaShe was a pitty little freak from chinaI said I dont pimp or gigoloIm havin so much money that I dont need a hoeYou can break yourself but you cant break meYou never met a player like $hort, babyI knew a dick sucker named betty-joTook her to my home and we did it on the floorThe girl got freaky and I tell you more:She was down on her knees beggin to blowShes like another freak named ren`You get her alone and shell make your dayLike burger king, she knows the playBut a freak like ren`, you can have it your way...These are the tales, the freaky tales...These are the tales that I tell so well...I met this girl, thick as hellOnly sixteen, said her name was linellI took her to my house, I could not waitHer shit was much tighter than central safeLet me tell you this since we talkin youngI met another girl, said her name was yvonneAlways talkin about havin funOnce again in the bed I got it goin onIm sir too $hort, couldnt be no punkI try to get funky like female funkSo when you see me comin or see me goinI keep my money, let the hoes keep throwinI once met a tender, she did it for freeOn the foothill bust number forty-threeAll the way on the back she was workin meHad my big beatbox and I was jammin the beatI met this freak named aunt winellMacked on the baby like an ice-cold vetEverythin she had is what I getCause Im too $hort, baby, I dont play that shitI met another freak, her name was ritaBaby thought that $hort just might eat herI told her like this, she can suck my peterOr even go home cause I knew I didnt need herScratched her name off my telephone bookNever again I took a second lookCause the next young freak, her name was sharonShe kept lookin, well, I kept stairinHer booty was stuffed in the jeans she was wearinShe never left, she cutted outI know you all know what Im talkin aboutTheres a freak named shane, such a sinnerShe smokes that pipe and shes gettin thinnerShane is cool but her mind is goneOne fat rock and its goin onShe had another buddy, came by my placeThick ass *****, said her name was graceShe walked in the door wearin a laceYou shoulda seen that look that was on my faceShes like this tender named belindaHomeboys call her belinda the blenderShe gave head like she made it upShe was twenty years old with a big round buttHad a girl slick like olive oilHer father was rich and the girl was spoiledWhen she got mad he blood would boilBut I rapped her off like Im lookin a toy...These are the tales, the freaky tales...The tales that I tell so well...Shockedy life, friday night, its goin on too $hortThree weeks ago I met this freakShe followed me around like marys sheepI hitted around the corner and when she cameI grabbed her by the arm and I asked her nameShe said it was nina and her mans in santa ritaI took her to my home and homeboy, I geed herSet her on the way the very next wayPlayboy $hort was ready to playI bumped to this girl, her name was roseanneWe hitted the motel and got it goin onHoliday inn to the break of dawnWhen I took baby home, I freaked her momI knew this tender named shanieI took her to the house and let her freak on meBaby was a fan, she loved my beatBut I wouldnt raise my leg to let her kiss my feetI met this freak named yolandaRolled baby doll like a brand new hondaI was on top and she was up underThe bed hitted the wall and it sounded like thunderI once had a datewith girl named kittyShe was so fine with big fat tiddiesAll night long she was actin shittySo I macked on baby like I was frank nittiTheres another girl, her name is roseI use to roll baby like brand new volvosI never saw rose wearin clothesShes a pimp house pet, ready to poseI was ridin down the street when I met janetHer booty was bigger than the whole damn planetAss everywhere, I just cant stand itTried to poem it but I could not manageI had this freak, her name was bunnySaid I was the only man who ever called her honeyEverythin I did to her was funnyI macked on bunny and I took her moneyEight tonight a date with shirlieShe was really short and her hair was curlyIf you saw baby you liked this girlieShe was so fine I went to get her earlyShirlie was freakin like a girl named rachelHer bite was vicious and it sure was fatalShe liked to kiss all on my nevalThose are her lips on top of my labelI knew another freak, her name was candyReal big lips and they came in handyI smooth got worked and it was so dandyI hooked the brood up with my homeboy randyHe did me a favor in returnGave me a lizard, said her name was laverneBaby got tossed and I got it onI grabbed the mic and started to sing my songMy young homeboy heard me rapAnd said he had way more freaks than thatSo I told him like this: they might be freakinBut, boy, you never had that t-p-treatment...
