The Book Of Mormon - Joseph Smith American Moses Lyrics
And now we wish to honor you withThe story of Joseph Smith, the American MosesWell, this is very good, praise ChristMormonI'm going to take you back in time(Mormon)To the United States, 1823(Mormon)A small and odd village called Upstate New York(Upstate)There was disease and famine(So sick)But also in this village lived a simple farmerWho would change everythingHis name was Joseph SmithHiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiya Joseph Smith, American MosesPraise be to Joseph, American prophet manAye, my name is Joseph SmithAnd I am going to ***** this babyWhat?No no Joseph, don't ***** the babyJoseph Smith, don't ***** the babySuddenly the clouds partedAnd Joseph Smith was visited by GodJoseph Smith, do not ***** a babyI will get rid of your AIDS, if you ***** this frogHiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyaJoseph Smith *****ed the frog God gave himAnd his AIDS went awayThen a great wizard named Moroni came downFrom the Starship EnterpriseJoseph Smith, your village is shitYou shall lead the villagers to a new villageTake these *****ing golden platesAwayAnd on the plates were written the directions to a new landSal Tlay Ka Siti(Sal Tlay Ka Siti)Joseph tried to convince all the villagersTo follow him and his golden platesLiberation, equalityNo more slavery for Upstate Mormon peopleI got de golden plates(Gold plates)I'm gonna lead the people(We head West)We gotta stick together(Mormons)We gotta help each other(We're Mormons)And so we climb the mountain(We head West)And we cross the river(We head West)And we fight the oppression(Mormons)By being nice to everyone(We are Mormons)Not so fast Mormons, you shall not pass my mountainDown from the mountain look who comesThe American warlord Brigham YoungYes, I am Brigham YoungI cut off my daughter's clitorisThat made God angry so he turned my noseInto a clit for punishmentBrigham Young, his nose was a clitorisWhat will you do Joseph, will you fight the clitoris manNot fight him, help himOhJoseph Smith took his magical ***** frogAnd rubbed it upon Brigham Young's clit faceAnd behold Brigham was curedJoseph Smith magical AIDS frogBrigham Young, frog on his clit faceBrigham Young was so gratefulHe decided to join the Mormons on their journeyCompassion, cutesyLet's be really *****ing polite to everyoneI got de golden plates(Gold plates)I'm gonna lead the people(We head West)We gotta stick together(Mormons)Now comes the part of our story that gets a little bit sad(Oh)After traveling for so long, the Mormons ran out of fresh waterAnd become sick with dysenteryWater go to the water, water go to the cupCup go to the stomach, shit come out the buttShit go in the water, water go in the cupShit go down the stomach, shit come out the buttUgh, oh *****Oh no, the prophet Joseph Smith is now getting sickShit go in the water, water go in the cupCup go to the thirsty, shit go to the stomachBlood come out the butt, blood go in the waterWater go in the cup, cup go to the tongueShit blood in the stomach, shit blood in the mouthShit blood on the insides, water come out the buttBrigham Young you must take the golden platesAnd lead the Mormons to the Promised LandPlghhDesperation, mortality, loss of faithI got de golden plates(Gold plates)I'm got to lead the people(We head West)We gotta stick togetherEven though their prophet had diedThe Mormons stuck togetherAnd helped each other and were really niceTo everyone they came acrossAnd then one day the Mormons finally foundSal Tlay Ka Siti(Sal Tlay Ka Siti)And there, the Mormons danced with EwoksAnd were greeted by JesusWelcome MormonsNow, let's all have as many babies as we canAnd make big Mormon families***** your woman, ***** your manThis is all part of God's planMormons ***** all that they canWe're in Salt Lake City landThank you, thank you but now we are *****ingThank you, thank you, but God wants us *****ingThank you, thank you, but get back to *****ingThank you, thank you, GodJoseph Smith ***** frogBrigham Young clit faceShit come out the buttJesus says *****, *****Mormons
